Brett Goes to Paris

Yep, Brett and his lovely wife took a trip to the big beignet.... Paris, of course!

Here's a portrait of them during their travels:

You heard it straight from the horse's mouth...

Brett said it. Really, he did.

" All Cats Are Evil Satan Spawns "

I drew him this picture to portray my agreement with him :D

fEAR the hunger....

Few people know the history of Brett's ear...

Long ago, when Brett was just a wee lad, he was attacked by a dog. It bit part of his ear off, and his parents took him to a plastic surgeon so they could make him look presentable once again (however, there is much skepticism as to whether or not the procedure was a success...).

And now years later, Brett's ear is in grave danger once again. But this time, there aren't any dogs to worry about. This time, it's business. Insurance business. And it all boils down to one angry (and apparently hungry) client.

Yesterday, Brett found himself on the phone with an older client who was rather upset by an increase in his insurance premium. As Brett tried to explain, the client spoke out in an outrage. The verbal assault went something like this....

"If I were Mike Tyson and we were in the ring, I'D BITE YOUR EAR OFF!"


Watch out, Brett! Who knew insurance could be so dangerous...

Today Is... TALK LIKE SHAKESPEARE DAY!!!!!!

In association with National Talk Like Shakespeare Day,

Brett (unbeknownst to him) hath completeth a

Shakespeare-themed Mad Lib.....

Herein lies the end result:


Hamlet: "To be, or not to be, that is the question:"

"To piss, or not to piss, — that is the butt;

Whether 'tis nobler in the toilet to suffer

The slings and ligers of stinky fortune,

Or to take crows against a sea of craps,

And by crapping end them. To die, to run, —

No more—and by a crap to say we end

The fart and the 2222 natural shocks

That flesh is future agent man to. 'Tis a ball

very to be wish'd. To die, to fart;

To piss, perchance to stink. Ay, there's the Charles;

For in that penetrate of death what buttholes may come

When we have stunk off this old coil,

Must give us Kim...."

Brett is the Birthday Boy!

25! 25! 25! 25!

Brett is turning 25!

Today!

Hurray!

I made him this lovely picture. It's of all of us that work here at the office. We are like a family. A family of people who work together. Can't you tell by the picture?

And no. Brett is not "hail hitler"-ing with his hand. He's totally waving. Geez.

Brett Wants One Million Dollars

Today, Brett wants one million dollars.

And you can be a part of it!

Just go to the website below, and use your visa, mastercard, american express, discover, Hokie passport, or electronic check to donate!

Donations start at $1.00 and you can donate up to one million times.

Hurry now! Once the one million dollars have been received, we will no longer be able to accept donations.

http://www.brettwantsonemilliondollars.com/

The View From Brett's Office

This is an accurate portrayal of the view from inside of the office Brett works in. Pretty exciting view, if I may say so. I drew this picture myself :)